Tuesday, 09 June 2009

• Family reunions. Blech.

  Last night, I was in a big-ass family reunion. I hate family reunions. It's all just a bunch of loud people, people you haven't seen in years asking you personal questions, people asking about your work. And people asking my most dreaded question of all: How are you?

  This people saw me grow up and naturally since I'm old now they would ask if I have anyone special in my life. Ok, normally, being the obnoxious person in me, I would make a disgusted face with a resounding NO! Which I did but really, I wish I said something along the lines of this:

  "Jill, Do you have a boyfriend?"

  1. "Yes, he's a musician in this really cool rockband, they're really underground so only cool people know about them. He's in Prague now touring. He's a sexy motherfucker and we have rumbustious sex in his massive hotel bed when he's in town. Oh, and I'm carrying his rockstar baby right now." *then downs beer* (ok, I would never do that. That's stupid. But it still sounds badass.)
  2. "He's in Africa now trying to look for solutions to world hunger. One day we're going to adapt a baby there and make a little family. We still haven't had sex. We're saving ourselves for marriage." *then downs milk chocolate*
  3. "He died of Leukemia. But I was able to make him witness a miracle." *then choir singing and downs holy water*
  4. "Relax, people! I will probably bring someone to one of these things when I turn 25! or at least when I find someone amazing. He's gonna be wonderful and he will win the hearts of all of you! Mark my words! You will all fall in love with him and wish he would marry you instead and not me but he won't do that because he's so madly in love with me and is again, amazing and wonderful."

  I was shouting the last one in my head but decided to make a face with a resounding NO! 

  ***

  I decided to eat the buffet food and drink beer (open bar!!) and get it over with. After a few drinks, everything just went by smoother. I got to spend time with my brothers. I miss them. I miss Dico and I miss the two of us making fun of Kuya when he drinks (because he doesnt. At all. He drinks a few and then passes out or throws up or something.) And I got to listen to stories of the coolest Auntie ever!

  Plus, I think I'm rubbing off on my mother. People kept telling me, 'you're so skinny! get some meat in your bones! Why are you so skinny??' and my mom would shamelessly answer, 'Drugs.'

  I'm so proud of her.

   

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