Friday, 26 June 2009

• Megan Fox is a man.

  It's a little late for carefully organized bulleted commentary on the new Transformers but I just saw it last night with my roommate and we had mixed emotions after stepping out of the theater.
  

  • the whole movie, I was screaming 'tanginang yan, leche ka.' (curse words in Filipino) because of all the scary magnificent robots popping in the screen. Ok so first there was Terminator and then this. The universe really does not want me to like robots. At all. Robots are intense. And big and made of metal. If one touches me, I'll turn to powder.
    
  • Do the robots really have to act human? I mean, they're made of heavy metal and they probably have some hi-tech gadgetry lying within them to have some hi-tech gadgetry way of taking out the other robot. But they choose to tackle and punch and throw each other like barbarians. And is it ridiculous how they spit steel carcass like how a person spits out tooth when they lose it after fighting? It's just weird.
  • *SPOILER ALERT* I would NOT know what to do at all if robots are hunting me and the only good robot capable of protecting me gets killed. I mean, I know that wouldn't exactly happen in real life. But yeah, I might as well kill myself.
  • on a lighter note: I wonder what I'll do if I'm walking down the street and suddenly there's a robot brawl happening in the middle of the road.
  • Doesn't Megan Fox's fake eyelashes fall off after all the running, dust, sweat, look-at-me-I-still-look-hot-even-when-I'm-in-the-middle-of-nowhere-running-away-from-robots-and-such? I mean really. How unfair is the world that she gets to be super duper hot even with all the shenanigans happening in less than 30 minutes while 30 seconds into the hulahoop and nevermind.. THIS IS HOPELESS! She's really pretty though.
    
  • (her boobs and lips are fake.) And she has a toe thumb! True faxx.
    
  • I only say this as a Communication Arts graduate that white pants only get dirtier and dirtier in the desert. Not slightly dirty, then a little cleaner, then dirty again. Continuity people!
  • I don't know if it's the director's idea to put the Megan Fox running scenes in slow motion because Megan Fox is running or the scene just really calls for it. hmm.
  • and she loses the jacket conveniently just before the slow motion running scenes.
  • Sam is moronic for thinking 'I adore you' equates to 'I love you'. They are different words for a reason. The whole 'it's the same, why do I have to say the L word?' excuse is fucking cowardly and stupid. If it's the same then say 'I love you' what's the difference right?
  • same goes with the whole 'what's the difference? why do we have to change anything? this is almost a relationship. what's your problem with it?' But that doesn't have anything to do with the movie. I'm just being obnoxious and inappropriate. *whistles*
    
  • Have I mentioned how awesome it is that Oompa Loompa is there?
  • No? Well, Oompa Loompa is there. And it is AWESOME!

  so all in all, after stepping out of the theater, I was amazed, scared, crushing on Shia more, bitter and my self-esteem pummeled to the ground thanks to Megan Fox (obviously) all at once.
  
  at least I'm still happy. Erika and I went sunglasses shopping (again) before the movie. So that's where my splurge per paycheck went. Yay for Willy Wonka/Elton John-ish new shades.
  
  
  

  
  

  
  I'm such an egghead without bangs.
  

  
  
  
  

  
  
  
  
  

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